The judges have decreed: "You are all under orders to not suck."
About 130 people got dumped hard Tuesday night by three cranky judges in no mood for mediocrity.
They made that brutally clear when, in front of an enthusiastic crowd of contestants and their friends/family in the Orpheum Theater, the judges abruptly and unceremoniously dumped the first six women who'd auditioned. Simon: "Terrible. No originality."
Given that most of these amateurs are deficient in that trait, his remark sent a blue bolt of panic through the theater. Within about 15 minutes of TV time, 50 more girls were gone.
She ain't heavy; she's my rejected sister.
Some shrugged it off. Several cried. One of those was Rachel Jenkins, an Army reservist who got cut in favor of that annoying Shakira impersonator. Rachel tried to be a trouper: She flashed a photo of her husband, who is/was in Iraq, and said she was OK because he'd be home soon.
Fake Shakira got cut in the next round.
Tuesday's one-hour show came on at a frenzied pace. In one hour, the field was cut from 172 to 40. Most of the show focused on the group performances, which is where some contenders got cut because they couldn't remember the words to the songs they'd chosen to sing.
One of those, however, wasn't Sundance Head, the burly, big-voiced son of '60s singer Roy Head. Sundance dropped and muffed his words in the group competition but slid through anyway. He was appropriately chagrined afterward: "If this isn't crazy, I don't know what is." One of the women in his group who did not advance was Robyn Troup, who sang with Justin Timberlake at the Grammys on Sunday.
Others who got the boot back home:
The sailor from the USS Reagan, who delivered a flimsy rendition of "You Lift Me Up."
Matt Costa, the kid who said he got no love/support from his mother (but called her every time he made it onto another round). He had lyric issues.
Sanjaya Malakar made it to the Final 40; his sister Shyamali didn't, which made them both sad.
The chunky wild-haired guy who looks like Jack Osborne made it; so did the guy who is a backup singer for Christina Aguilera. The Fidel Castro/Matisyahu look-alike didn't.
Above: After Bayley got sent back to the ranch, she wept and blamed a distracted rival.
A lot of Tuesday's time was spent following Bayley Brown, the Texas teenager who was in a trio with the best friends from New Jersey, Antonella Barba and Amanda Collucio (who act like half the women in "The Sopranos"). There was some bitch-sniping between the friends, and some exasperation over rehearsal times. In the end, Bayley B. completely muffed her lyrics and got sent home, devastated.
The other two survived, and Bayley B. didn't take that very well. She confronted the Amanda chick, saying she screwed up her words because they didn't rehearse enough because Amanda was flirting with male contestants in another room instead of practicing. The Amanda chick denied all that and took the high road, saying she made it through because "God likes good people." While she was saying that, the producers showed footage of her flirting with male contestants in another room instead of rehearsing. She didn't make the Final 40, but her friend did. The drama has stirred up some folks over at the RealityTV blog, who think Bayley got Al Gored.
Tonight at 8 p.m., the field gets cut to 24.
|Timothy Finn, The Star
You know, I've only seen a total of about 15 minutes of American Idol. When I hear how popular it is I just have to shake my head.
It seems like such an incredibly dumb show -- like you must have to be some kind of mouth-breathing, People Magazine-buying doofus to like it.
Now, I'm no media snob. I like all sorts of stupid stuff. But American Idol just seems so much worse than even your garden variety pop culture entertainment.
It honestly makes me sad for America.
C'mon, America. There's better stuff than this.
Posted by: Florn Roonst | February 14, 2007 at 10:28 PM
And for goodness sakes, Finn, quit propping up this lame show with your writing. You're better than that.
(By the way, loved your work with Crowded House -- you should get back in the studio).
Posted by: Florn Roonst | February 14, 2007 at 10:31 PM
Thanks for dropping your standards so low you bothered to read this and leave us a long, thoughtful response. I suspect you've seen more than 15 minutes of the show. (By the way, my best work was with Split Enz.)
Posted by: Tim Finn | February 15, 2007 at 08:17 AM
Oh, my standards go far lower and my thoughtful responses get much thoughtfuller.
Honest, only 15 minutes. In an airport bar or something. I know, it seems suspicious.
Perhaps I was too hard on American Idol. After all, it does prominently feature Paula Abdul, so how bad can it be?
Posted by: Florn Roonst | February 15, 2007 at 11:22 AM
Split Enz?
I loved your song "I'm Not In Love"
something something, so don't forget it
it's just a silly phase I'm going throoouugh (ba da da, da da, dum)
big boys don't cry big boys don't cry ... etc.
Posted by: Florn Roonst | February 15, 2007 at 07:47 PM
"I don't know why sometimes I get frightened ..."
Posted by: Tim Finn | February 15, 2007 at 10:45 PM
Even if you don't like the show, don't assume that Timothy covers it because he wants to. The paper probably assigned it. Its called having a job.
The "other" Tim Finn, in addition to doing great work with Split Enz, had a nice self-titled cd in the late 80's that I remember liking a lot.
Posted by: leonardcoehnbrothers | February 16, 2007 at 10:49 AM
LeonardCoehnBrothers? That sounds like a made-up name, so I'm not going to take your defense of Mr. Finn's (if that is even his real name) coverage very seriously.
Tim Finn's obvious idolization of American Idol borders on, um, idolatry.
But, on the other hand, he's succeded in making me a fan! Before all this ink was spilled I thought American Idol was lame as a snake with bumble foot. Boy, was I wrong! That Simon fellow has a quick wit. And who knew there was so much talent out there, in America?
Posted by: Florn Roonst | February 18, 2007 at 09:23 PM